HaPpY Family~~

Dalam entry kali ini, aku nk publish kan few photos of my beloved family members.... Sbb dlm all entries before, aku byk menulis tentang kawan2....diri sendiri...sampai aku lupa pada mereka yg amat penting dalam hidup aku. Amat penting. So, these are few photos taken during my vacation at my lovely kampung... Lama dah gambar ni..Cuma x upload je.. Check it out!! (^_^)

My mak and abah ~~ Love them sooo much! ~~


Me with my younger sisters ~ From left: Ayu, Ani, Ana~


My beautiful and gojes Opah..hehehe

He is one of my family members ~Rambo...tp mak suke tulis Rainbow.....whatever la,tp I love him very very much~

Me and my sister, Ayu..~during kenduri

Ni tgh berkumpul nak g kenduri.....

From left: Ayu, Abang, Cu, Ani..~Meeting before g kenduri~

Ni rombongan wanita2 @ kenduri...Yang lelaki and budak2 dh hilang.... ^_^

Ni berkumpul kat umah Opah

At my house..~During raya~

My cute cousins..~ At my house

Itu aje lah...Ni cuma sikit je...From my mother's side je... Nanti I'll upload pic from both side, Mak and Abah..Hmmm.. Dan dikesempatan ini, I want to say that.. I love them sooo much!! I love myself...I love my family...I love my frens.... And I love people around me!!! \(^_^)/

Lumrah alam~

Setengah manusia anggap diri mereka sempurna, walau mereka tau hakikat tiada siapa yg sempurna. Setengah nya lagi cuba untuk menjadi sempurna. Bagi mereka, apa yg nmpak salah di mata mereka, salah lah orang itu. Tapi kenapa setiap kali kita cuba mencari salah orang lain, kita sering lupa mencerminkan diri kita dulu? Layakkah kita mengkritik, sedangkan kita juga lakukan perkara yg sama? Layakkah kita menasihati, sedangkan diri sendiri perlu dinasihati? Betul…manusia perlu saling tegur-menegur, nasihat menasihati, ingat-mengingati, untuk mengelak yang mungkar….Tapi mengapa perlu disampaikan malalui orang lain? Tiada kekuatankah untuk bersemuka? Atau malu? Mmmm.. manusia…

Beginilah, tegur-menegur memang dituntut dalam Islam…agar manusia tidak hanyut..tapi tolonglah pastikan diri sendiri tak buat benda yg sama… Itukan lebih berkesan….

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Bila ini terjadi pada aku, aku bersyukur punya kawan yg sudi menegur…terbukti masih ada yang sayang. Tapi, nak menasihati, kenalah ada caranya. Api akan padam dengan air, tapi kalau cuba ditiup dengan angin, dengan harapan api akan padam, silap-silap api lagi merebak. Renung renungkan..Selamat beramal… ^_^

~Such a great December~

These are some photos during my birthday party (6 Dec )... Thanks guys.. for everything.. Luv u all.. Really appreciate it..

Thanks for the party guys!

Jatt and Ana -- Thanks dear

From left: Shahrul, Aro, Fakri, Reha, Aino, Ana, Reen

Ni lah umah aku yg kecik...huhuhu..kecik tp besttt...

From left: Afni, Emah, Ifah

Bantal ni bkn hadiah dari jatt.. ni from naz and ifah.. thanks..



Dats all!! Neway, thanks guy for the wish..thanks for the thought...thanks for everything!! Luv u all!!! Juga berterima kasih pada yg igt aku...and of course...sape2 yg bg hadiah tu.. hahaha.. Tahun depan bg lagi eh.. \(^_^)/

~Selamat Pengantin Baru: Opel and Senah~

Last Saturday (1/12) was my friend wedding.. Naufal and Hasnah.. at Shah Alam.. So, these are few photos yg sempat di upload... Hmm..both pengantin are very cute and Hasnah is very beautiful.. as always.. ^_^

To Opel: Cukup cukup la perangai budak ko...pasni nk jadi bapak budak lak.. hahaha

To Senah: Jadi la isteri yg baik....hehehe

To both of you: Semoga korg kekal hingga ke syurga! Cepat2 dapat anak.. hahaha.. tahun depan raye umah korg, kne bg duit raye la.. huhuhu..doa doa lah yg xkawen lagi ni supaya kawen cepat.. huhuhuh

Hahaha.. xsangka Opel dh kawen..hahahaha

From left: Yus, Wan, Yani, Hasnah, Noni, Ana, Afni, Emah

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Photos kat bawah ni plak time tunggu Yani kt Masjid Shah Alam.. before ke kenduri Hasnah..hmmm.. Diva berposing.. huhuhuhu... Best hang out ngan korg..with HoneyVi.. hehe Nnti kite g cameron lak eh.. Muahhz.... Nnti aku upload gamba lagi...Check it out!

From left: Noni, Ana, Afni

Noni and Ana

Dats all!! After ni, turn Wa and Dollah...Wan and Faheem....hmmm..sape lg eh?? Doesnt matter la sape2 pon, yg penting, jemput aku!! Kalo x, aku bom kenduri korg.. hahaha \(^_^)/

~Me at my work station~

Hahaha..these mencapab photos were taken at my cubical at Satyam.. huhuhu.. nmpk sgt xde kje kan... hmmm... Ifah selalu lalu lalang kt cermin belakang, selalu komplen : "Kenapa meja ko bersih sgt??" hhahaa.. dah xde keja ifah ooii.. (T_T) And currently Im doing e-learning (self-study) for my upcoming projects (hope I'll get it soooonn)...dah busan gile.. Hmm last week I had a small chit chat wif my senior, and she had told me dat this 'boring' season is common for trainees.. Back to her time before, she wasted 6 months of her time in Satyam doing nothing! And once she got the project, it was a none stop project!! And now, she is happy in Kuwait, for 2 weeks.. huhuhu.. People. Once the have rest time, the wanna work. And once they are working, they wanna rest. Hmmmm....What a life!!

~Raya yg telah berlalu~

Rumah terbuka Lin...dari 5pm sampai kul2am merayap

(3buah rumah: Aini, Lin, Ajis)~Thanks guys!! (^_^)

Sambut Deepavali kat Seremban: Jayzee's house

(Satyamite yg muhibah) hehe

Ni kat umah Reen (4bijik kete konvoi ke seremban)

Umah Kuga ~Hepi Deepavali~(At Seremban)

With budak2 SMTI....From left: Deeya, proyos, zura, arl, Anabest, juare

Hmmm...raya dh pon berlalu....duit pon dh banyak yg abis....So, sekarang la mase nye nk kumpul balik duit and........diet!!! huhuhuhu... All da best to AnaBest!! hahaha

~8 random facts/habit about me.~

1. Happy

• Byk benda bole menghappykan aku... Easy to make me hepi. Kadang2 small things pun can make me smile. Bagi aku, hidup mesti happy.. Hidup sekali je, rugi ah kalau masam2. Kalau happy bkn untuk sendiri pun, utk org lain pun ok. =)

2. Suka bebas

• Sangat suke berpoya2. hehe Setiap hari bagaikan hari minggu!! Suka aktiviti tanpa dirancang. Sbb bebas utk buat keputusan, bila2 je.

3. Jarang moody

• Tp kalo aku dlm sedang dalam mood yang buruk, lebih baik anda segera menghilang dari pandanganku. hehehe Dan jgn lah di tanya pasal hidup ku masa tu.. hmmm..

4. Kadang2 luv to be alone

• Dok sorg2 dlm bilik...layan cd...kadang2 rasa lemas ngan dunia luar. Aktiviti paling best (kat umah Gerik je bole buat) - lepas mandi, stay dlm bilik, pasang radio, buka internet, milo atas meja.. Perghh.. best gile..Nak hidupkan lagi suasana, tambah scene hujan kat luar....Terasa nyaman je...Pastu ZzzzZzz.. hehehe

5. Cepat panas....cepat sejuk...

• Kadang2 aku cepat marah. Tp kalau aku marah yg 'bersuara', tandanya, xmarah sgt la...but kalo marah yg 'diam', hmmm...tgh berapi api la tu.. hohoho tp yg xbest nye, aku ni cepat sejuk.. xbole nak marah lama2..rasa berdosa.. woooo

6. Senang nak lena

• Ni masalah utama aku. Pantang letak kepala, nak nak kalo ade org main2 rambut... Lenaaaa...Agak2 perang dunia pun aku leh lena...mana2 pon leh tido..hehhee

7. Degil dan nakal

• Ada hamba Allah ni cakap aku degil. hmm.. kadang2 je lah, tp dlm hati aku baik ooooo....wink wink wink

8. Patriotik dan setia

• Ini tak ramai yg tau..aku sgt patriotik and sgt sukakan unsur2 patriotik. Pendek kata, aku leh hafal lah lagu2 patriotik malaysia. hehehe dan aku ni tersgt lah setia wpon suke berpoya2...berkawan biar seribu kan...hehe

Tagging rules:

1. Each blogger must post these rules.

2. Each blogger starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.

3. Bloggers that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their eight things and
post these rules. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged
and list their names.

4. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’ve been tagged and to read
your blog

Nak tag saper ek:

• 1. Jatt
• 2. Noni
• 3. Huda
• 4. Ifah
• 5. Filzah
• 6. Mira
• 7. Tokapi
• 8. Sidek

p/S: Sape2 yg di tag, jgn nak ngelat ye..... \(^_^)/ Love u all!!

...huhuhu...

bosan.... currently, im in phase 2 in satyam... although i was not so gud in phase 1, in glad to be assigned in Data Warehousing team. Together with my new ofis mates, all my days are great. But all uia team in satyam are not with me. huhuhu reha was assigned into DBA, Aizat, wan and yus are joining Q Edge and zeze in Java. =( so sad... and nx week, i'll start my phase 2 training at satyam's old building... not in the same building with them. huhuhu neway, im starting to luv my new frens now.......

...Aku adalah Satyamite...

Hmm..agak lama aku tak memblogkan hidupan aku nih... dah lebih sebulan kan. nak kate aku bz smp xde mase nk blog tu, tipu lah.. cume aku kekontangan idea.. Ruang2 otak aku yg sepatutnye aku gune utk menghasilkan idea2 bernas dh terisi dgn ilmu2 baru yg aku dapat dari Satyam ni. huhuhu.. idup aku kt company India ni x ubah seperti hidupan mase aku student dulu. yg beza nye, usaha aku menghadapi tests and exams membuah kan gaji setiap bulan. hehehe tu je.

Position aku kt Satyam ni cume trainee je.. So, byk jgk la yg aku dh belajar dari trainer2 yg teror maut tu.. Antaranye, Mr. Manoj and Bhargavi. Sumer indian. Dorg sanggup trun dari India semata2 nk bg training kt budak2 malaysia yg ampes nih. huhuhu ramai mbe2 tanye, best ke keje Satyam tuh?? Jawapan nye, tentu la best..sbb trainees yg join Satyam ni sumer lebih kurang sebaya je... Bole buat geng. tp aku dah terpisah ngan Reha, yus, wan n Aizat. huhuhu so, lain kelas, lain lah schedule nye. huhuhu and skang, aku ade kawan2 baru yg same gak hampes nye.. aku ade Lin, shu, fawaz, ab, shah, fakri, pjo...ramai lg lah. xkan lah nk tulis sumer 48 org tu laks. =)

Cume 1 masalah kt satyam ni. dulu, aku bahagia je bole surf macam2 site..bole meebo, bole frenster, bole donlod lagu...macam2 lah..tp skang ni dorg dh block sumer. termasuk lah atunnel. hampeh kan. tensen aku.dh xleh berpoya2 ngan internet. huhuhu

ape lagi aku nk citer eh?? hmmm.. aku dh dpt emel id untuk satyam. Tp oleh kerana sumer emel id ni diuruskan oleh staff kat India nun, ade ke patut dorg bagi aku emel yg mamalukan??? farhana_binti@satyam.com huhuhuh lagi sekali aku tertekan!! macamane aku nk berdepan dgn masyarakat??? aku malu!!! tp aku dh komplen pun. mane bole aku biarkan hidup aku dipermainkan sebegitu rupa. so, emel id baru aku, farhana_fadzil@satyam.com hehehe baru sedap skit nyebutnye.... =)

Aku ade byk gmbo2 baru yg bole dikongsi bersama, tp hari ni aku curi2 gune pc yus (sori yus...), so, segala gambo2 tu xde. nnti2 lah aku upload.. termasuk la gambo2 konvo aku.. huhuhu so, kpd kawan2 yg selalu komplen aku xde updated blog, nah..bace la blog yg x seberape nih.. maleh aku nk speking omputih sbb memandang kan kite baru menyambut kemerdekaan yg ke 50, cintai la Bahasa Malaysia!! Merdeka!!

~kerja...kerja...~

hmm..dah lame xblogging ni... Lately aku bz sgt ngan hal2 duniawi ni.. Bz fill in service agreement ngan satyam... bz cari umah sewa... bz buat clearence nk konvo...sume mende ni begitu menuntut mase aku yg x begitu reti bab2 membahagi masa ni. huhuh neway, zillion thanks to all my frens yg sanggup susah payah sekali menyebukkan diri demi aku.huhuhu

So, esok hari last aku merempat kat uia tercinta. Tp last for dis tiring moment la. I'll be back. Tp xtau la bile. Memikirkan 23july ni aku start keje, aku jd cuak...takut...teruja.. hehehe but luckily i hv reha, azeze n jatt together wit me at satyam. Hilang skit takut tuh..tp ntah la. xtau camne working environment kt sane tuh. Silap2 dpt g India. best nye!!

So far, member2 yg baru grad ari tuh, sumer dh dapat keje. Ade gak tolak byk offer. hmmm...like ape Bro hamwira ckp time aku borak2 kosong ngan die.. " I heard rumors..pasal ict graduate pyh nk survive out there. Payah nk cr keje. Tp I heard, ur batch sume dh dpt keje kan. So now, im confuse. All those unemployed tu from University or Kolej? " Hmm... tu mmg issue yg sering di bahaskan. Kat kampung aku, penah isu ni penah jd topic utama. Dorg ckp.."Buat ape anta anak g U, kuar belom tentu dpt keje." Aku terkesima. Mereka ni seolah2 dh kalah sebelum berjuang.

So, from my humble opinion, ni sumer rezeki masing2. Time belaja, kite belaja...Time keje, kite keje.Buat ape susah2 pk kan sumthing negatif yg kite sendri xtau penghujungnya? Kite cume merancang...usaha... tepuk dada ty selera. Jadi, aku amat berharap dpt mengubah pemikiran org2 'lama' kg aku yg agak tertutup tu. huhuhu.. neway, wish me lak... i really need luck rite now. heheheh

musim buah yg best

Im bored. Dats the main reason why im sitting here, updating my blog. huhuhu holidays are nice. in fact, some people wish they hv absolute holiday for their entire life! And some are different. they work...and work...and work...until die. Opss...im not pointing anybody! For me, both are nice. Holiday...and work...bcoz i need both. And the nicest moment for me is when 'orang kampung' like me can enjoy the the 'musim buah'...In dis season, i believe most of 'orang bandar' wish to be at kampung...ye ke?? hehehe my family has our own dusun...and our own pokok getah...petai..durian...rambutan...dokong...betik...etc.. And thanks to my mom.. It's all her effort! While my father is bz with his outstation work...my mother with her kebun...my younger sister with her practical training...Im enjoying myself alone, eating those buah!! hehehe jgn jeles...I can even bersila under the rambutan tree and plug the fruits while reading magazine. hihihi Lebat buah sampai ke tanah. =) Nyum..nyum..nyum... And yesterday was a very unforgetable moment for me. My mom and I sat alone under the rambutan's tree....eating the fruits and chatting...We talked so many things... She told me so many things...And we laugh together... =) I'll never forget her laugh...her smile...her eyes...everything! It's nice to be me...It's nice to be my mom's daughter....It's nice to be org kampung...

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I've got my final result. it's not so good, but i guess i'll still get 1star (*) during konvo. hehehe =) hmm..ICT konvo day will be held on 26/8/07. It's on sunday. Neway, I rily rily hope dat all my frens will be there..and dun forget to bring some gifts...or flowers...but pls dun juz bring ur self and say: "Ana, aku bawa kasih sayang je utk ko...." huhuhu...

~Fear of nothing~

I feared being alone
Until I learned to like Myself

I feared failure
Until I realized that I only Fail when I don't try .

I feared success
Until I realized That I had to try In order to be happy With myself.

I feared people's opinions
Until I learned that People would have opinions About me anyway.

I feared rejection
Until I learned to Have faith in myself.

I feared pain
Until I learned that it's necessary For growth.

I feared the truth
Until I saw the Ugliness in lies.

I feared life
Until I experienced Its beauty .

I feared death
Until I realized that it's Not an end, but a beginning .

I feared my destiny
Until I realized that I had the power to change My life.

I feared hate
Until I saw that it Was nothing more than Ignorance.

I feared love
Until it touched my heart, Making the darkness fade Into endless sunny days.

I feared ridicule
Until I learned how To laugh at myself.

I feared growing old
Until I realized that I gained wisdom every day.

I feared the future
Until I realized that Life just kept getting Better.

I feared the past
Until I realized that It could no longer hurt me .

I feared the dark
Until I saw the beauty Of the starlight.

I feared the light
Until I learned that the Truth would give me Strength.

I feared change
Until I saw that Even the most beautiful butterfly Had to undergo a metamorphos is Before it could fly .

~So, my fear dissapeared~

Interview oh Interview

I went for an interview yesterday for database programmer position.The interview was at 10am, near to kerinchi lrt. and i managed to get there 5min b4 10am bcoz I get lost. huhuhu luckily i was ontime. The interview seesion started exacly on 10am where as i hv no time to 'retouch up' my make up. hehehe And there were 2 interviewers, 1malay woman (Prof Dr. **** -- around 40's) and 1 chinese guy (Lim ***** -- around late 20's).

At first there was nothing serious conversation...All the ques are about my skill...my ability...my future dream...bla..bla..bla.. ans i juz answer them seadanya. But, about 1/2 hour later, I was forced out of my confort zone. She asked me all about things that 'logically' I cannot answer. of corse not, coz im not an experience job seeker. Hello, im fresh graduated! Dun compare me with 3years experience worker. Huhuhu..

About 1hour I kept pretending OK..and keep pretending to smile when they started to compare uia with other university..And they condemed me about my fyp report which I followed exacty the format from Bro. Rizal.. Still remember what she said: "Mcm ni ke budak IT buat report? Main belasah je..."

Dalam masa 1 1/2 hour tu, aku rase mmg nk lari terus je..It was like an army interview! although i never join army..=) hehehe but the thing is, it gives me a really gud experience..(from positive side la..think positive...think positive...)..

After dis, I must be ready for any ques..For any 'condeming' ques....From there I can learn how to handle the situation, if it happens again..Neway, wish me lak for my next interview...Yg tersurat..Im trying to find the best post for me..Yg tersiratnye...im trying to find the best salary.hehehe..Tp keje kt Satyam pon ok la...But b4 23July, I'll try to find one that can exacly suit me...Fuhh...Penat kene 'belasah'...aku terus g tgk wayang Fantastic4..hehehe

p/s: I hate when ppl compare me wit anything!!! It was like a nightmare for me! Juz ignore me when u dont like me. Juz tell me if u dun like me.

..My final week in UIA....

Sob..sob...sob...sedih nya aku.. detik2 terakhir dekat uia ni kadang2 'menghappy' kan aku.. kadang2 menyedihkan aku... kadang2 mendebarkan aku...kadang2 membuatkan aku terfikir...'Dah bersediakah aku?' =) 'Mampukah aku?'

Dlm tempoh 5tahun kat UIA ni (including matrix uia), so many things i've learnt..So many things i've had...So many things i've lost...There r many things dat made me sad.. but just because my eyes dont have tears doesnt mean my heart doesnt cry. and just because i come out strong doesnt mean there's nothing wrong. often, i choose to pretend im happy so that i dun have to explain myself to people who'll never understand.. But, when i think again, dats nothing regrets me...nothing dissapointed me.... But,sometimes we need to be steady and give up the things we want the most. And now...im happy on what i choose and what i have now is what i dream b4..At least...

I had kek for lunch juz now. A kek from reha-- dat actually from fad. =) sedap...dat cake was for reha's graduation. Huhuhu semua nak grad dah.. For those yg still have 1 more semester in uia, i wish u all da best! Let me recall sape ek.. emah..afni..huda ismail..huda rahmani.. mira..hasnah.. maiza..rafi..amy.. All the best guys!!

And for all yg dh grad, noni, ifah, filzah, yani, reha, wan, yus, wa, ja, diyanah....congrats guys! U guys deserve a good life out there..Juz be happy in what u do...Hmm..sebut pasal diyanah ni, i think it's not too late to wish her a very happy wedding life.. dah kawen dah die.. And after dis, dah ramai waiting list yg nak kawen...Kan?? =) Xpayah la nak mention, nnti ade yg malu2 kucing lak. All i hope is...dat particular person (sape2 yg nk kawen), dun ever forget to invite me.. InsyaAllah sampai lah hamba Allah ni...Neway, aku post kan several pics diyanah utk tatapan korg...

p/s: doakan aku cepat kawen..hehehhee

Mari kita berhenti sejenak, merenungi kembali bekas langkah2 kita dlm kehidupan ini. Melihat dgn cermat apa saja yg telah kita lakukan selama ini. Perhatikan, adakah langkah2 kita dimulakan dari tempat yg baik? Adakah dlm perjalanannya langkah kita terhenti di tempat2 yg semestinya? Dan yg paling penting, adakah langkah2 kita menuju kepadaNya?

(Cerita ini hanyalah rekaan semata-mata.....)

And..this is where it begins...

"B.A.N.G" serentak murid2 kelas 2Kuning mengeja.Panas tengahari tidak menghalang mereka meneruskan pembelajaran. Kelembutan Cikgu Aisyah terserlah dgn kurung biru muda. Kelembutan itulah yg mengikat kasih syg nya dgn murid2. "Apa bunyinya?" Soal Cikgu Aisyah lembut. 'Nak test skit budak2 ni.Ade ke yg teror.'Diam.Kelas jd sunyi.Sepi.

Di hujung kelas, Fara berusaha mengingati apa yg di belajarnya mlm td.Mulutnya terkumat kamit."Bang!" itu yg akhirnya terkeluar dari mulut nya.Penuh yakin. Serentak semua menoleh ke arah nya. 'Ulp, salah ke?' Mukanya mula kemerahan. Malu di renung semua. Skirt biru tua yg dipakai nya di sapu sapu bagai ada kotoran yg melekat.

"Fara, jgn malu. Apa yg kamu jawab tadi? Boleh ulang?" Soal Cikgu Aisyah lembut. Fara masih malu2 tp di teruskan juga."B.A.N.G bang." Kelas masih diam. Semuanya diam.

"Hahahaha!!" Amir yg dari tadi cuba menahan tawa, menekan2 perut ketawakan Fara. Fara menjeling. Benci betul dia dgn Amir. Budak gemuk, hitam dan nakal tu sering ketawakan Fara. Tawa Amir bagai tiada penghujung. Perut nya yg besar bergoyang2 mengikut rentak tubuh nya yg masih seronok ketawakan Fara. Fara pelik. 'Apa yg lawak sgt?'

Cikgu Aisyah faham sungguh perangai nakal Amir."Amir, kenapa kamu ketawa.?Tak baik ketawakan orang" . Amir terdiam. Namun sisa tawanya masih ada. "Lawakla Fara cikgu. Ada ke bunyinya 'bang!' Tu kan panggilan mak sy kat abah saya. Bang....." Azlan mengajuk ayat ibunya dengan lenggok tangan ala mak nyah.

"Hahaha!!" Kelas 2Kuning tertawa besar mendengar jawapan Amir. Ada betulnya. Fara mendengus. Tak puas hati dengan sindiran Amir."Ah! Kalau kau pandai sgt, apa jawapan nya?" Fara melenting. Pantang sungguh bila di permainkan begitu. Amir terus bangun menyahut cabaran. Penuh yakin. "B.A.N.G bunyinya banji. Betul kan cikgu? Ayam saya nama Banji. Hari ni baru saya tau ejaan dia." Amir senyum memandang Fara. Bangga.

"Hahaha" Cikgu Aisyah terlepas ketawa tapi cepat2 cover. "Ehemm...jawapan kamu kurang tepat. Tapi tak apa. Itu yg kita akan belajar hari ni. Salin apa cikgu tulis." Murid-murid 2Kuning patuh. Fara tersenyum memandang Amir yg masam mencuka. Laju tangan nya menyalin nota cikgu. Apa yg di ajar hari ini, dia sudah pun belajar semalam. Hari ni cuma salin je lah. 'Nasib baik semalam belajar dengan mak, kalau tak, jad bodoh macam kau la, Amir!'

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Some sayings for today...

-Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark.
-Take risks: if you win, you will be happy; if you lose, you will be wise.
-Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten.
-A smile confuses an approaching frown.
-Character is much easier kept than recovere.
-Don't try to be different. Just be good. To be good is different enough.
-The right to do something does not mean that doing it is right.
-Friends are like melons; shall I tell you why? To find one good you must one hundred try.

Malas. Satu-satunya penyakit yg xde ubat nya. Kalo ade pon, penyakit tu xkan totally hilang. Esok lusa die dtg lg. =( dan sekarang, penyakit tu tgh merebak dlm salur2 urat dan otak aku. Pls somebody...pls tell me what to do. Xtau nk buat ape padahal keje belambak. Org len aku tgk sume tunduk je buat keje. Busy tol. Ke buat2 bz? heheheCurrently, im taking MCAD (Microsoft Certificate Application Developer) -- microsoft profesional certificate. Ade 3 exams kalo nk dpt sijil tu. so far, aku dh pass 2 exams. Lagi 1 menanti dgn penuh setia 18/6 ni. Huhuhu.. Hopefully kau pass. Bkn senang nk dpt cert ni. Kalo amik kt luar, mau RM10K cost die. Tp buat kt uia ni, free la. Government py project....1st exam aku scored 816/1000 and 2nd exam dpt 826/1000 and hopefully final exam nnti dpt 700++ pun dh OK. Asalkan lulus...

im feeling 'blue' today...feeling sad...feeling blur...feeling empty...hmmm.. why aa??? there is nothing in my mind rite now, but i feel lots of things are waiting for me to settle down... but where to begin ha?

hmm...i hv 18 more days to go. On 18/6 i'll complete my study in uia.. end of my students life. ..end of assignments...and end of simple, easy, enjoyful life... =( but, more challenging world is waiting for me..and i hope im ready for it. =)

Last weekend ICT gurls organized a simple, cool, unforgetable bon voyage party.. Let me recall sape yg ade.. hmm.. Noni, huda, emah, afni, reha, rapi, mza, senah, huda rahmani, ifah, ainen, ja, mira, ju, yani, yus and wan.. Thanx for those who came.. And sape2 yg xdtg tu..dun worry.. u guys r not forgoten.. hihihi.. best mlm tu...and kemuncak nye.. time gifts exchanging .. aku dpt hadiah dari ja.. i got bunga pot puri (betol ke eja) =).. wangi.thanx ja.. and my nice, preety gift, wrapped with surat kabar jd milik afni.. hehehe simpan la mende alah tu bebaik ye... Org betuah je yg dpt tu.. =)

Ni die some pic yg dpt aku tunjuk kan... Waaa aku sedih nk grad.. I'll miss u guys!

3.23pm (thursday)

i'hv been silent from this blogger world for a quite some times...why?? im too bz with my 3P program... at the beginning of dis sem, i was planning to enjoy my last sem here...but it seems everything is turning up to be sumthin different..huhuhu dgn prob telekom nye...dgn kelas lagi...dgn 3P lagi... huuhuhu...

miscommunication ngan telekom makes me really2 annoy.. mnyampah!! miskin, kering kontang aku kt cni..kalo ade sugar daddy, xpo la jgk..isk, dose...huhuhuh but not only telekom is confusing me, finance uia pon same..why student needs to pay RM500 kalo buat 3taun stengah?bkn duit uia dh byk ke? why they keep asking us for money? kalo camtu, baik buat 4taun...xrugi pape..huhu bosan ah jd mangsa confuse nih...

hmm..rite now, im i 3P klas.. ni 1 lagi masalah dunia..bosan gile, but it is quite fun.. sonok gak belaja ni..kene blaja sungguh2 ni, tp the class starts at 9am until 5pm..huhuhuh 'best' siot ngadap pc nonstop! dh juling dh ni..and next week, our 1st exam.. it is all about sql.. harap2 lulus and then proceed to d next stage, .NET

wish me lux...

3.08am

im sleepy...but still hv time to do my fav hobby, surfing.. (-_-)

2weeks holiday..enjoy abis.. tp letih jd buruh kasar kt umah ni.. what i did were juz a routine. everyday...but today..adus.. bcoz of my last day kt rumah, my mom mengerahkan seluruh tenaga aku..kemas2 umah..angkat2 brg...angkat almari..katil..meja...huhuhu penat siot...but it was quite fun.. doing all da things together...had fun wit my sis.. bergurau senda..cewah.. but da prob is.. bile bercampur gaul ngan habuk+debu, start la arlegic nye.. adus..seksa mak, nyah.. =)

Esok, bus kul 9am..tp brg still unpack. huhuhu malas rasenye.. but its not too long..jap je..sampai bulan6, grad la aku. InsyaAllah...

ngantuk ah.. nite. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Hmmm..semenjak 2menjak ni aku semakin rajin menulis… menulis tentang hidup… tentang diri…dan tentang org lain…satu2 cara yg mungkin dpt meringankan bebanku.. satu2 cara yg dpt meluahkan perasaanku…

Aku mahu menceritakan 1 situasi… ketika aku bersama motivator yg paling aku sanjungi.. My father..

Aku bknlah dlm kategori yg pemalu atau penakut, tp dlm satu2 keadaan, aku akan menjadi malu yg teramat.. takut yg teramat… sampai x boleh bergerak… sampai rasa nk lari ke ujung dunia… Sampai aku rasakan dunia ni x adil pd aku… huhuhu mungkin kwn2 yg rapat pernah tgk aku dlm situasi yg mcm ni.. huhuhu

dan satu hari….aku, mak + adik berada dlm kereta and the driver of course lah that motivator… dan die tau aku ada kelemahan ni… kelemahan yg xdapat di buang dari kecik… Peristiwa tu berlaku di pasar mlm.. punye la ramai org… and we r still searching for parking space.. then, the motivator asked me ( why it is always me?!!!) ;

Motivator: Ana, cuba bayangkan dlm sesak2 tu ana pegang belon yg amat besar…Bw belon tu dari ujung pasar mlm sampai lintas jalan…. Sanggup x? Malu x?

Ana : Hush… xnak ah.. Malu!!

Motivator: Cuba byg kan pulak… situasi yg sama, ana bawak belon besar dari ujung pasar mlm sampai lintas jalan.. tp kat tepi jalan tu ade Shahida (sepupu umur 4 tahun)… belon tu untuk die…nak bg kat die… Sanggup x? Malu x?

Ana : Hmmm.. (terdiam sambil dh faham maksud tersirat)

Motivator: Tak malu kan? Ana dlm situasi yg sama… Orang tetap pandang…. Tp niat tu membezakan perasaan kite.. Apa yg kita fikir tu yg membezakan perasaan kita.. bukan ape yg org lain fikir…. Dorang tetap akan pandang, dorang tetap akan bercakap, tp ape yg kita fikir, ape yang kita capai…tu sumer datang dari dlm diri kita… Malu dan takut tu kita yang cipta.. Semuanya bergantung pada kita… buat ape nk takut ape yg org cakap.. ape yg org fikir…

Ana : (terdiam…..) Betul jugak… (dlm hati)

Thanx abah! Motivasi yg die bg tu betul2 buat aku terfikir tp kadang2 manusia ni pandai berfikir je… xpandai nk ubah! Ekekeke.. but I’ll try to change… =)

Hello…1st of all, I wish to express my gratitude to those who generously helped me color this beautiful life…my family…my frens…and me, myself… =) why im saying dis? …This is not d end of life?.....0

hmmm….dis is bcoz…’externally’, I feel very happy…next short sem is going to be my final sem…until June…end of my student life…but actually, it is not d end. It is juz the beginning. The beginning of my miserable life…Opss, dats not my words… some seniors said dat.. And I hope they are all wrong!

But ‘internally’, deep inside my heart, I am sad. Student’s life is the most precious moment in my entire life. Feeling young…acting young… pretending to forget my own age.. I guess….

hey, im still young!! =)

So, what’s my destination next? Get a damn good job or hanging around while planting grapes? Naaaa… I dun know…….. Actually, im not dat type of person…. dat dreaming for a damn good job…what a good job for me is….is good job…. Hahaha… secret remains secret…what to say? I have my own dream…After I’ve got lost so many time, yet, im still sticking on that dream… hope I can achieve dat.. pray for me…

Hmmm…saying about dream, it makes me remember to someone who is close to me…a damn good fren of mine… And he gets offered for Master in Moscow, Russia, with scholarship..… Fuhh…tak abih study lg, dh dpt offer…kalau a normal person get dis offer, nobody will refuse to go. But unfortunately, dis beloved fren of mine is not normal… he is insane. =) hahaha …Sorry dude..

But he is what he is.. Rejecting that offer perhaps makes him sad or confuse or happy… I dun know…only u know the reason, fren… and as a damn good fren, I will always support u….. Pray for u…Till the end…I promise.. bcoz, he has his own dreams…like everybody.. Hope u achieve it!!! hahaha aku best kan!

End of story. Hmmm..So, how about we call it a day!! Isk..mcm ayat bro rizal lak.. hohoho ampuuun sir… I have 1 more paper to go.. Requirement Engineering… Wish me luck..coz I rili rili need luck rite now.. huhuhu.. daaaaaa

Dlm usaha mententeramkan hati, aku mula menulis sebuah cerita jujur tentang apa yg aku rasa dan…kenangannya… ketika aku mula merangkak untuk mendalami hidup, kefahaman tentang cinta terpaksa ku belajar. Wpun subjek cinta xpernah wujud d sekolah, namun manusia sering berlumba utk A wpun hakikatnya mereka hanya layak utk D..ataupun repeat…

Di sini ianya bermula…
Dia hanyalah sebuah nilai utk aku memahami cinta. Bahkan aku sedar dari ilusi dan anganan, yg realiti itu lebih indah jika kita sentiasa bertanyakan soalan yg betul dan menghargai apa yg di anugerahkan…

Hidup hanyalah nama. Hidup hanya lah simbol. Ianya menjadi batu tanda utk aku memperoleh apa jua kebaikan yg ditawarkan utk aku. Ia jg ada pengukur jarak tentang apa yg telah & belum aku lakukan. Ia mengajar aku mencari erti cinta; dan tiada cinta itu tiada batas, ukuran dan bentuk. Ia hanyalah satu rasa, spt manisnya gula dan masinnya garam…

Aku cuma nk bercerita…
Secara jujur, aku berasa lapang dgn nya..mendengar suaranya… malah aku taburkan janji untuknya… biar dia tidur berbantal awan, berpintal lembut mengenak lenanya…mimpikan gemerlap bintang yg kita kutip dan menyeri fajar nanti…
Sekurang-kurangnya, itulah yg aku rasa…

Komunikasi aku dan dia berjalan lancar separti yg diskripkan hinggalah aku terasa tiba2 ada sesuatu yg meragukan dia…dan dia meletupkan cebisan yg benar2 mencederakan aku…dia menceritakan ketakutannya..dia mempersoalkan tentang janji yg bakal dimungkiri…
Adakah kita benar2 bahagia seperti mimpi kita?

Aku, selaku penghulu segala keraguan tak dpt nk kata apa… dari situ dia bertambah yakin tentang keraguan nya yg membawa kpd memperlekehkan aku.. dan ia betul2 memberi kesan dan giliran aku pula meletup… sebahagian besarnya adalah apa yg keluar dari batas sabar aku… hasilnya…aku rasa, aku tak perlukan dia lagi…biar aku harungi hidup aku yg selama inipun aku hidup tanpa hadir dirinya…dia hanya singgah menyinari…

tp aku hanya manusia…kepedihan itu, kalau kerap dirasakan, tegar juga aku di buatnya!

Aku igt aku dpt lari…aku silap! Apa yg aku perlukan adalah pengisian kekosongan jiwa ini…musuh utama aku masa ini adalah kesunyian… dan aku harus bermatian melawannya…

Utk itu, pemikiran adalah cara terbaik utk menilai baik buruk satu tindakan… dan daripada pemikiran itu, akan timbul satu keputusan utk menyatakan di pihak manakah aku berada. Yg lebih susah ialah tak tahu nak duduk dipihak mana…macam aku…

Aku tak boleh…tak mampu nak teruskan…tp.. live must go on…
Krn Kau Tuhan, yg aku minta tlg…dan Kau Tuhan yg aku sandar…Aku perlu kekuatan…Aku perlu sebab… Sebab utk teruskan hidup. Krn ku rasa…hidup adalah erti kepuasan yg tidak ternilai…

Wpun ku rasa mengadap puaka nombor satu…dgn peluh jantan, pondan, betina di dahi…dgn lutut yg lemah…usus yg memulas…dada yg pecah…tetapi apabila sebab itu hadir…dgn penuh semangat! Berusaha! Akan ku ikhtiarkan utk terus hidup…

Dia memandang aku sebagai seorg yg tewas… Mmg aku pernah tewas, mmg aku sering tewas…tp kali ini aku akan jd kan ia satu kekuatan utk aku terus berdiri…satu sebab utk aku teruskan hidup…dan satu pengajaran utk aku jd kan kenangan… kenangan yg memaksa aku belajar utk menerima kenyataan…

Punya lah sensasi…seolah ku tahu siapa diriku…dan apa yg ku impikan…ia sungguh jelas…

Jadi, ini hanyalah permulaan!

“...Settle with the past,
Engage with the present,
Believe in the future…”

11.17pm...

At last!!! Everything went smoothly....Berakhir la showcase fyp utk sem ni... To all the fyp students, congratulations!!!!!!! to all the lecturer n frens yg dtg, thank u.. thanks for ur kindness of giving us a high mark... tu pon kalo bg high mark.. huhuhu i luv dat moment...dat showcase moment...it will remain in my heart forever... isk isk isk... wpon, xterlalu ramai yg available to come, tp xputus2 yg dtg.. thanx.. huhuhuh pasni ade yg dh grad.. xjmp dh... sedeyyy...

Gambar2 cs students dlm fyp lab.. pagi2 buta bergamba... going to miss u all.......